I Struggle. . .
I sit here struggling with what to write for this week’s post. Yes, it’s Thursday and the post doesn’t have to appear until tomorrow. But if I don’t do it now; it won’t get done. And I haven’t a clue what I want to say. What I ought to say. What the Lord wants I say!
A bit of history. . .
- I began what I call blogging in 2007. I wrote long pieces that I published on our 1st virtual community called The Connection Station. The Connection Station sat on a NING platform. When we took it down in 2013, it had nearly 1000 women members from all over the world.
- Oddly enough I wrote into that community of brilliant highly connected women daily. Almost 260 days a year for nearly 7 years; and sometimes on a Saturday and/or Sunday.
- I never seemed to run out of ideas about which to pontificate; and even more oddly, The Connection Station women seemed to like what I had to “say”!
But Things Have Changed. . .
As I sit reminiscing about the early days of AWI & The Connection Station where I met Jen Sakowski (she was Jennifer Raney then), Gloria Wilson and some other women from the NING platform; I wonder if I’ll ever recover the flowing creativity I had in those early days. It seems nothing fresh and new comes to mind when I sit in front of the laptop to write each week’s post.
I could of course, write about the struggle itself and how we all struggle with something. I could search my mind for wisdom and brilliant solutions to our mutual struggles as women of faith who may or may not be owners of a small business.
I could mourn the loss of creativity that may come with our ‘vintage’ years. But then I remember that Gloria Wilson is 4 or 5 years my senior and admits to being more creative now than in her younger days.
I could curse and rue the day I quit smoking 3 years ago. I recall that when I got a writer’s creative mental block, it was immediately cured when I stepped onto the back porch to relax, light up and puff away. However, I’ve come to covet breathing, so it was a no-brainer choice to make.
There are many excuses I could make for the struggle, but none of them give rise to the subject of this week’s post.
Pretense & the Struggle to Be Real!
The struggle I face is universal. Not in it’s specificity but in the fact that life doesn’t come with a bed of roses. Neither does it come with the promise that it will be easy or without moments of struggle we would rather hide from view.
For some odd reason, many of us think that hiding life’s ugliness is what the world expects of us. And for some that may be true. But most folks like to know that those they meet and hang out with are just as human as they are. And the human condition doesn’t come with a warranty guarantee!
Let me put it this way. When on Facebook, I can pretty much tell the folks who are hiding life’s yucky stuff. While I shy away from those who are always telling their latest dastardly moment; equally I gloss over those who hide those moments as if life is perfect. . . just as they are perfect!
The struggle is to be real. Not to be anything else but who we are without fluff or pretense. Excited and eager to share life’s mountaintop moments; but as easily willing to share the pit-stops-in-hell as well. After all, my pit-stop-in-hell may help you grab my coattails so we can crawl out together!
It occurs to me the old saying “misery loves company” is true. Whether the company we keep is miserable or joyful; they are at least real! And their real-ness is our invitation to be real too. We don’t need the gory details, just the fallout will do!
I Could Have Lied, But You Would Have Known!
I could have babbled about most anything, never mentioning the struggle I was engaged in while babbling on about nothing of import. But you would have known. At least those of you who have been in my ‘tribe’ for a while. And while trying to hide my dis-ease; I become a woman I am not.
For the goal of my life is to become the best version of who God designed me to be. And He designed me to be open, upfront and honest with my tribe and most certainly honest with myself. Honesty with self and others is what keeps folks hanging out with us over the long haul. Especially when the haul is very long! And the longer we hang out together the more we get to each other. So if I had lied about the struggle I faced when I sat down to write; you would have known!
Okay So What. . .
That’s a polite way of saying “so what are you really trying to say“. I’m simply affirming that the best course of action at anytime in our lives is to be as strategically open, honest and up front as possible. Not that we spill the entire candy jar; but that what we do spill comes without excuse guilt or shame.
At times each day, I struggle with something. I suspect each of you do as well. In fact, I believe strongly that every living human being struggles with something every day of their lives. Maybe not major, but just something that doesn’t fit into the round holes and square pegs of our daily lives.
All I’m trying to say is that’s okay. Just say so. Maybe someone can be of help. Who knows, maybe I can be that someone!
Linda S. Fitzgerald, M.S.Ed, CEO & Visionary Partner
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