Over the past months, I’ve begun to experience angst at the mention of getting everything we need for “free“! Yet the very folks who advise others in my circle of friends to get it for free charge me for their services or products. Somehow the logic of this doesn’t line up. Perhaps it’s just my ‘vintage’ perspective, but if you want me to give it away free – then you ought do the same. You may call that a quid pro quo – I call it equality!
This week I had an “angst attack” when I read something in my Facebook stream about getting it for free. What I felt was so strong, I decided to write about it today. However, the title came – but not the words. So what’s a ‘vintage dame’ supposed to do when the words won’t come yet the point needs to be taken?
I’m a huge fan of Chris Brogan and his partner, Rob Hatch. This a.m. I opened Gmail and found Rob’s Thursday e-letter. He doesn’t talk about getting something for free – or angst – or anything of the sort. He does, however, talk about serving others. About how that’s his and Chris’ ultimate passion – helping others. Giving us the tools we need to succeed. So why share the entirety of his letter?
Because he and Chris charge for their service. They have a fee for helping others. Not exorbitant mind you, but they rarely give it away free! I decided that I had the content I needed for this post. And that I’d let Rob (and Chris) speak for themselves. . .
“I’m not a big fan of personality tests, strengths finders, or the like, Linda. They’ve never really appealed to me, mostly because I’ve rarely, seen the results used well.
It’s a fun exercise but not much happens in the way of ongoing, consistent, cultural integration in any organization I’ve worked with. In short, not much changes.
Someone I’m not
You’ve probably heard someone say something like this; “I can’t be someone I’m not.”
It’s meant to be a noble thing, to underscore that you are a person of principle.
All too often I fear it is being used poorly. It is used to justify a position or an unwillingness to budge from a decision. Sometimes people use a phrase like that manipulatively, to garner attention or avoid criticism.
There’s another version of this phrase. We use it more often than we think. We may not even say it out loud, but think quietly to ourselves phrases like: That’s not me. I could never. I don’t know how YOU do it.
Be who they need you to be [emphasis mine]
We love to think in dichotomies. We tend to think in terms of our strengths and our weaknesses; I’m good at this, I’m not good at that. It makes life a little simpler, some reassurance of who we (think) we are.
It’s never as simple as that, though. There are layers of abilities we possess that we can call upon when needed even if we’re not aware of them.
Maybe writing isn’t your strength it takes you longer, but somehow you can call upon the ability when you need to and do it well.
Perhaps you’re not the most organized person, but when you have to, you can pull things together and find a new way of staying on top of it.
You may not always be calm under pressure, but in a moment of uncertainty, fear, and chaos, you’re able to find stillness, communicate clearly, and direct the action as though it were in slow motion, knowing exactly what to do.
None of it is easy, but it’s what the situation called for. It’s who someone needed you to be.
We all have strengths and we tend to play to them often. They serve us well for the most part. However, when we start to draw lines and define ourselves only by what we are good at and what we aren’t, we close ourselves off. We miss the stuff in between because it feels uncomfortable. But that’s where growth happens.
Opportunities to be more than we think we are, live in the spaces in between. We find them when we allow ourselves to be who someone needs us to be without fear that our character is somehow in question.
Since the launch of Online Course Maker, Chris and I set out to share our knowledge and our methodologies. We have shared our strengths, our successes and our pitfalls. In that time, we’ve also learned how to better serve the over 500 people in the course, even if that meant calling upon our less obvious abilities to make sure people have what they need.
We know pretty well who we are, but we don’t hesitate to find better ways to be of service by stepping into that space in between.
We’ll be talking about that on our LIVE webinar, Tuesday, April 28th. Please join us, as what we’ve learned, and maybe let us know how we can serve you better.
Have a great week and I hope to see you there.
Special thanks to Chris for stepping in last week. I’m incredibly grateful for his friendship and the way our business works.”
That’s it! They charge a nominal fee for the “LIVE webinar” of which they speak. I know because I’ve gladly paid to attend. I do so for 2 reasons –
1. To gain wisdom and knowledge for myself, and
2. To have something to pass onto the women we serve through our organization.
Finally, I can think of 2 takeaways from today’s post –
1. Never, but never be ashamed, afraid or the least bit timid about charging for what you know – and do. You’ve earned the right to do so!
2. Never be duped into thinking that anything offered for free doesn’t have a buy me attached. It may come at the end – but it will come!
Linda S. Fitzgerald, Visionary Partner
Champion of Ordinarily Extraordinary Women of the World
A Women’s Place Network, Inc. dba
Affiliated Women International
Empowering Women to Thrive
You’ll find us at the following locations-Come Join Us!
Neighborhood Boutiques – OPEN for YOUR BUSINESS
COFFEE in the NEIGHBORHOOD
The Neighborhood at Facebook
Neighborhood Boutiques at Facebook
[author] [author_image timthumb=’on’]https://fbcdn-profile-a.akamaihd.net/hprofile-ak-xap1/v/t1.0-1/p160x160/10933880_10152999878054264_1749306739390848122_n.jpg?oh=3b9b3e144f0b306aa0cc748b03d9dd6a&oe=55550352&__gda__=1432002183_d9a5e0b3a35fc3cfbbe66ed7bc7658c9[/author_image] [author_info]My passion is to see women become all they are designed to be – personally, professionally and most of all – spiritually. I write, teach, mentor and coach with that passion in mind. As an author and prolific blogger, I reach out to women in all walks of life, especially women of faith to empower and equip them for greatness. [/author_info] [/author]